The Cemetery - VIII

Part 1

Mathias

23rd June, 1712

It is only now with sound mind and sound body that I can recall what has happened. This will be my last penning in this journal for I have set out to conceal these words from the world and cast them aside with the bones I have exposed to the light. No one will know the truth aside from me and that is alright. I will die with these images ever burned into my brain. I know not why then I feel the need to recall and restore my mind to that night or why I must put it to paper now. I feel compelled to. I feel like I must put these words down in the service of another though I shall pray that no one finds this text. I have already started melting the wax I wish to encase this journal in. I will move at night and then I will be gone from this town forever. I can’t show my face again in this place. I can’t breathe its air. I can’t feel the amiability of its people. I am not worthy.
                The night of the 20th of June into the morning of the 21st will forever haunt my mind and soul as long as I shall live. In these pages that proceed this entry I have described my pain and fear and worry in concerning my family. The loss of my daughter, the apparent illness of my wife, and the fear of darkness that permeated all my comings and goings betwixt them.
                In the days prior to the days I have mentioned I called upon an old friend in Dr. Starcross, a physician of mental and physical health that I had met many years before. He was in fact the man who helped my wife in years before with sleep deprivation and other brain maladies she was carrying at the time. So upon noticing a drastic change in my wife I sought him out as an agent to help her.
                He agreed to meet us and stayed for a few nights to prepare his machinations of experimentation upon her in sleep. After one final attempt to speak with my wife I found nothing more to be done on my end and we simply resolved to the tests.
                That night after she went to sleep, we approached her room to listen for her speaking that I had reported to him before. It did not take long for her words to emerge in the dark. She spoke as if in conversation with someone. She once again spoke of a trial, how things would go the way they were always meant to and that steps need be taken.
                We entered the room stealthily enough and found her laying in sleep. Her eyes were half open, irises turned back towards her skull. It made me shudder with how still she lay. The doctor reassured me that it was normal for the eyes to do this but that a person’s eyelids should remain closed. Nothing truly abnormal had occurred, in his words, so far.
                In the room he set up a table and a few instruments I can barely recall their function and he sat next to her bedside. When he drew near her voice returned.
                “They are here.”  Her voice was monotone and cold. I stayed across the room out of sight, practically hiding in the shadows. Dr. Starcross was not as feeble as I was and leaned over my wife to speak to her.
                “Who is here?” the doctor said.
                “The twilight ones. The ones of the trial. They are all here.”
                “What are they here for?”
                “As witness to their purpose.”
                “What is their purpose?”
                There was a pause. The room grew colder by degrees and I felt my bones ache and skin tighten with fear. The doctor seemed not to notice this or either how the room seemed to get darker though we had brought in candles to light our work. The same presence I had felt in the study while conversing with my wife seemed to be present but this time a new aura could be felt. One of dark intent. I wished to flee to take the doctor and retreat until daylight, but I could not move and he seemed intrigued.
                “What is their purpose?” Starcross repeated and in a swiftness,  I can not be sure is even humanly possible my wife shot up from sleep. In her violent motion the doctor was knocked to the floor. He fell almost knocking his already bruised head, having been struck by my wife’s shoulder in her motion, on the night stand missing it only by inches.
                In the faint light I could see my wife’s eyes glowing a deep hollow red. It shot an icy spear through my heart of hearts. The being sitting on the bed starting to move to is feet in a jerking violent motion was no longer my wife. But a beast in my wife’s flesh. That could be the only conclusion.
                I slid down the wall towards the table of instruments to find a weapon to protect myself. In the background I saw the doctor stumbling to his knees and then to his feet. In a daze from the blow to his head he reached out and grabbed my wife on the shoulder. The sudden shock of being touched made her spin in a whirlwind. With that action she put the doctor off balance and exposed him to her next violent outburst.
                I can not say if this image will ever leave my dreams or my waking sight. The same image I had beheld days before in a dream had become a reality. My wife ripped open the fleshy parts of the doctor’s throat with her teeth and hands exposing so much flesh that the bone was visible underneath. She stood over her quarry and looked at her hands so reminiscent of the dream I had that I felt like I was reliving the experience tenfold. She even looked longingly at eh mirror on the wall in the same way I recalled from the dream.
                I’m still not sure how the next moments came to pass. Whether it was animal instinct on my part or the divine touch of God himself, or the guiding hand of my angelic Genevieve, I cannot say. But in the next instant was upon my wife in a flurry. I had had taken a metal instrument of some substantial weight and charged at her with it. I bashed her on the head bringing her form to the ground in a heap of flesh and blood and broken bone.
                I know now that a devil inhabited my wife for once I looked upon her face staring up at me, pleading for mercy before my next blow, I saw a glimmer of change flash over her eyes. If I had hesitated even for a second to finish my savagery she would have bitten into my flesh as she had done to the poor doctor sprawled below us. With two more crashes of my hand I snuffed out the vessel of the great devil. With her expiration I felt the presence flee the room, the light return from the candles light, and the weight of oppression I had been feeling be expelled.
                I fell back against the wall to behold what had transpired without the white-hot fury of instinctual rage to guide me and the rooms stench of death flooded my senses. At what cost had I acquired this respite from devils? What would have been spent if I had not done what I had? All I hoped for in that instance, was not forgiveness for my deed, was not respite from my crime but simply that my wife’s soul be taken to my daughter, so they might live together in Heaven. For no matter the deed that caused it, or the greater good that followed, murder was still a capital sin in the eyes of God. I knew I would not escape his wrath, but I prayed he would show mercy to my wife. For she knew not the pact she was making, I’m sure of it. I will never know fully what transpired for my wife to accept such a pact. What gifts the fiend I saw behind my wife’s eyes promised to her for doing her bidding. All I know is that she will finally rest in peace in death.
                I will move her body to the cemetery and dig her a grave of my own making next to my daughter. This will all be in secret of course and I will place this text with her as evidence that I was not in fact the murdered of my wife but that this shadow devil was the culprit. I will leave this place once my deeds are finished. I will burn down my old home and I will never set foot anywhere near Westknell again. I owe their spirits that much.

I’m sorry my loves…Genevieve…Josephine…I am truly sorry.

-Mathias Ryan McMahon

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