The Cemetery - VI

Part 1

Mathias

17^th June, 1712

Through my study door a small voice whispered that her friend would be arriving soon. Over the past few days small changes in my wife made me begin to believe that whoever wore her face was not in fact her. Little twitches of small muscles in the light, the way her eyes shined with a grim smile of delight, words heard in sleep that were more mysterious than any other I had heard her utter before.

                In sleep she spoke of shadowy creatures, beings of twilight and a trial. All words that feel ill on my ears when I heard them. Upon hearing them from down the hall the first night I was under the impression she was having a wakeful conversation with someone but once I opened the door to peek in, I saw she was laying in sleep, yet her lips were moving.

                I have since cloistered myself in my office to avoid her until Dr. Starcross can arrive. I sent a letter of inquiry with Langley to have the good doctor call on me here. I only hope his travel is met with haste and few obstacles. I can’t stay hidden away for much longer. My wife gives me no respite in the house, never leaving the vicinity for me to be alone.

                Someone is at the door…

18^th June, 1712

Thank god it was Dr. Starcross who arrived and not the friend of my wife. She has left us be and I have been able to speak with Dr. Starcross about the recent developments. He has agreed with me that it is strange and he will conduct a series of tests on my wife in the night. He will lodge with us in a separate guest room. I feel safer knowing I’m not alone in the house with her.

                The dread I feel can not be put easily into words. I can only contrast the feeling with how my wife used to make me feel. She was a radiant being in my life, always the better of us, and made life worth living. Seeing her in the morning took the breath from my lungs and kept a beat in my heart. I am…was utterly in love with her.

                Now the figure that occupies these halls has a very different effect upon me. She is cold, distant, and seems to steal the light instead of giving it off. I have not laid with my wife since before out daughter passed but I knew up until recently that desire still existed between us. Now however I feel a different desire emanating from her. Her eyes trace my form in ways they hadn’t before. I see a fire in her gaze that gives me pause.

She has kept her distance and remarked at Dr. Starcross’ inclusion with only one phrase:

“This changes nothing.”

It was as if not spoken to me but to someone else to hear. A shudder of fear erupts down my spine at these words and the expression upon her face when she makes it. A resolution. A promise is made in those words. I fear what the next nights will hold.

Starcross says we will move in the next two days. He must gather supplies but by the twentieth he should be ready. I need to stay diligent.

cont.

                I’ve just woken from a fright and I fear my heart will explode now with exacerbation if I do not rid my mind of these images. The words I will now utter are not of my own making, they are the malady of dark dreams not my own wishes. Please God forgive me.

                In sleep, though I wish not to recall this, I have murdered an innocent. There is blood on my hands and a feeling in my chest of glee. In the scene of malice I’m standing over the corpse of Dr. Starcross. I see my hands covered in red. The floor a pool of blood. My heart is beating fast and an explosion of…glee erupts through my form. What is this devilry? Though I do feel something is amiss. Upon reflection I noticed that it wasn’t actually me standing over the corpse but I had been transported. I was looking through other eyes. I was seeing the deeds…of my wife.

                In a subtle remembrance that is fading even now as I pen this confession of nightmares, I recall a reflection. A mirror on the wall showing me the visage of my wife but she was different. There was a shadow encompassing her form. A blackness in her eyes. A grim smile pulling back over her black teeth. In that instant, the instant before waking in a cold sweat, she raised her hands to her mouth and began to lick. She lapped the blood off her fingers and into her mouth with such sexually charged intensity I cannot believe it was coming from my wife, who is normally a very timid woman.

                I will pray for redemption of these devilish visions and pray that my wife is not this demon I have seen. It cannot be.

20^th June, 1712

                It is the morning and I await for Starcross to return. He assures me that he will be ready for the sleep experiments when he returns this evening. For now I have stolen away from the house and my wife to gain some peace of mind. I’m seated in the tavern attached to our inn. My pen shakes with each stroke as the crowd shuffles around me. And in this moment I wonder if it is not my wife is in a malaise but if it is indeed me. Am I the one who is being strange? Am I the one who has not yet recovered from the loss of Genevieve? I have not seen her grave in some time. Perhaps I will visit today. I pray that the air around my daughters statue and her image will still these fears in my heart.

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